Celebrating Mother’s Day with dementia in the picture may seem a little hard to plan.
When mom has dementia, celebrations may seem a bit more challenging. But this does not mean that you shouldn’t celebrate them. True, Mom may not even know that it is Mother’s Day. But you know. And if you do not do something to celebrate there will probably be a part of you that feels guilty.
Here are some great ways to celebrate Mother’s Day when Mom is in a care facility.
Taking Mom Out For Lunch
If going on outings is still something mom likes to do then, by all means, do it. There may come a time when she is no longer able to go. But there are a few things you should consider.
Mother’s Day is the Busiest Restaurant Day of the Year.
Restaurants will be loud and too busy to cater to individual needs. The crowds may cause confusion. And this could lead to anxiety and poor behavior. Choose another day to celebrate. Preferably during the week when restaurants are not quite as busy. Furthermore, pick a restaurant that is more intimate. One that is designed with quiet nooks for families to gather for a meal.
Make the day special.
Celebrate Mother’s Day with flowers. Just because Mom has dementia doesn’t mean she does not like to be treated special. Corsages were popular when she was a young lady. Make her feel special with a corsage. Have a special dress picked out for her to wear. All of this will bring back pleasant memories and make her feel special. That is the idea, right?
She May Not Be Able to Or Want to Leave Her Care Home
“It got to the point where taking mom out for lunch was no longer an option. She would become agitated and confused. And when we would bring her back to the home, she would start screaming that this was not her home. She said that she didn’t know these people and didn’t know why we were leaving her there. The whole ordeal was stressful for everyone. Mom wasn’t happy, we weren’t happy and the caregivers now had to deal with a very unhappy resident.”
Then We Discovered a Better Option
We Brought the Meal to Her
“The staff allowed us to set up a special meal for Mom and our family in the dining room. We even brought her tablecloth and china. This was something she always used for special occasions at home. I saw her eyes light up when she walked into the room. We made sure there were flowers on the table and a special corsage for Mom also. This was a great idea”
Everybody Wants to Visit Mom for Mother’s Day
Even that brother who never comes around or offers to help will show up on Mother’s Day. And if your family is quite large this can really overwhelm someone with Dementia. Try to coordinate with your siblings to spread the love out over several days.
Create a Memory Board
Get the whole family involved. Ask each person what is a happy memory they have with Mom when they were a child. Did you and mom bake together? Maybe you worked puzzles? How about special vacations you took as a family? Skiing together, boating or maybe just Storytime at night? What are your special memories? Now if you can find a picture that portrays this memory. If you do not have a picture of you and mom doing the activity just a picture of you at that age or the two of you together.
Create a bulletin board for Moms Room with all of these memories and picture on it.
Now when someone visits mom, they can play the “Remember when?” game. Chances are Mom will still be able to access those long-term memories. But even if she doesn’t, just seeing your face light up and hearing your voice talk with excitement and joy will make her feel good.
People with Dementia Pick Up on The Energy Around Them
If people are happy and enjoying the day there is a good chance, they will feel the same. Likewise, when people around them are stressed out and anxious it is no surprise that they will also become anxious. A person with dementia may not be able to understand the words you say. But they can pick up on your tone of voice and your mannerisms.
This is Why Memory Care Homes Make Sense
You may have tried caring for Mom at home and it didn’t go so well. The problem is that you are too close to the situation. You have a lot of energy and emotion around the situation. And if you are feeling anxious about trying to balance caring for Mom with work or your family Mom will pick up on that.
Moving Mom to Memory Care
But when you move Mom to a Memory Care Home like Sycamore Creek Ranch, you are allowing yourself to become the son or daughter again. With a team in place, trained to care for folks with dementia you can rest assured that Mom is okay. And now you can really enjoy your time with her. Isn’t quality time better than quantity?